Saturday, May 15, 2021

On Proudly Displaying One's Handiwork

The orderly, if that's even a real word, came in this morning and gave me a shot of something.  He said I'd been out of line.  I only had a dream.  It made me cry, but I'm okay now.  My memory is this:  Daddy got mad at something I did and needed to punish me for it.  I don't remember what I did, but I sure do remember the punishment.  It's probably the seed that sprouted into what I am today.  I did a bad thing, and daddy made me go upstairs and take all my clothes off.  He said I better hurry up.  He came up and beat me with something hard.  My ass cheeks were glowing and hot to touch, and he went back downstairs to finish his coffee with mommy.  He called me downstairs and said not to get dressed, so I headed down slowly one step at a time because my behind was sore.  He called me into the kitchen so he could proudly display to mommy his handiwork.  I didn't cry.  I promise.  I didn't know how to be embarrassed of my nakedness in mommy's presence.  I spun around at daddy's direction.  Mommy just sat there, crying and helpless as usual.

The orderly had to remind me that I was here because my daddy wasn't any more.  He said I did another bad thing and mommy was alone now.
I think I'm ready to be good now.  Is it lunch time?  I'm hungry.

(the orderly shit's made up, though the memory is real.  The storyteller's not in a facility or anything.  Don't want anyone taking things too seriously.)

17 comments:

  1. That ending is perfect. Great storytelling. I just wish none of it were true. :( On a happy note, I appreciate that you like to keep things simple. And thanks for visiting my silly blog. I'm so glad to have found yours. Be well!

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  2. Another piece that manages to upset me. And thats a compliment - to make the reader FEEL.

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    1. Much appreciated, Tom. Thanks for continuing to read.

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  3. Wow, that made me sad as all get out. No kid should have to go through something like that.

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    1. Just another day in the paradise that was my youth, Mary. Oh sure, I'm certain there were some good memories, it's just that these are the ones that seem to stick out the most. Thanks.

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  4. The Momma Bear in me hates all of this. The storyteller in me thinks it's great writing.

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  5. I often tried different ways of telling my story on earlier blogs. I've settled into the voice I use today. Sometimes you need to take a step back to express yourself.

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    1. True that. I suppose posting such things could be cathartic for some, however, it's purely entertaining for me. It's deep history.

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  6. God I hate this. I'm sorry you had to live this.
    It's not tears this morning,--nope, no it's allergies balanced.

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    1. Well, I'm sorry if it was a morning downer for you, Margaret. I've come out the other side of it nearly unscathed and don't want anyone feeling sympathy.

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  7. I am glad you are able to share, balanced, and you are nearly unscathed as you mentioned to Peggy. But man, oh, man, it is terrible that it happened to you.

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    1. Oh, Mr. Shife, looking back, the things we grew to accept as normal were astounding.

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  8. I'm so sorry for your younger self. This is horrifying, and it's too many children's (and/or adult's former) story.

    I'm glad your life is completely different and much better now. Thank you for sharing this.

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    1. And thank you for checking in, Rawknrobyn. Funny you should mention- later in life I somehow managed to learn that, as bad as I thought I had it there are others who have it so much worse.

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  9. You write so superbly, about some very disturbing Real Life shit, that unfortunately any Child has to endure. The Beast Mother Protector Instinct in me would like to go Mental on your Dad for your Younger Self. The Granddaughter had a Bully incident Today on the last Day of School, she handled it Brilliantly and Today's Post I could not contain how Proud I was about how she was Superb at The Big Payback. That said, she joked that if she'd allowed me to handle it she'd have to visit me in Prison probably... she could be Right. *Winks*

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